June '03'

Disclaimer - All characters in this story are from Final Fantasy 8 and belong to Square. The song and lyrics to ‘Feels Like Forever’ belong to Joe Cocker and were a great inspiration. This was written for enjoyable reading and is not for making money. The main pairing is Laguna and Squall - this means incest. If you don’t like this forbidden pairing, then don’t read…you’ve been warned! Otherwise, enjoy!!! ^_^

This is YAOI - boys with boys, caring, desiring, kissing, hugging, groping…um, yeah…but that’s why you’re reading this, yes?

Feels Like Forever
By Garden’s Gnome

Laguna Loire made his way through the darkened and quiet hallways on a mission. It was somewhere in the vicinity of 2am and the president of Esthar was hungry. So, munchies run to the kitchen it was. Awoken by a rather vivid dream and kept that way by his body’s demand for sustenance, Laguna had no choice but to leave his warm bed in search of something good to eat. Unfortunately the main kitchen that held all the best late night snack foods, i.e. hot chocolate and marshmallows, was located on the other side of the palace.

Sighing in annoyance at the necessity to obey his gurgling stomach, Laguna was about to step into the lift that would lead down to the kitchens when he heard piano music coming from the main ballroom located nearby. Curiosity won over the hunger pangs and the longhaired man found he quietly tiptoeing back up the hallway to the caterer’s entrance of the large room. Cautiously opening the door a fraction, Laguna peered into the room.

Totally dark except for light coming from the far end of the room, Laguna was unprepared for the slight shock of seeing the one individual who haunted his every sleeping moment. The only person he wanted so much he could almost taste them. Someone who was not supposed to arrive for a few days.

The young man that was also his son.

At the black grand piano bathed in the light of a single candle sat Squall Leonhart, eyes closed as his fingers flew gracefully over the keys. Listening to the music for a few bars, Laguna found himself surprised. Not by the young man’s skill but instead by the haunting tune he played so effortlessly. Julia Heartily’s ‘Eyes On Me’. A song written for Laguna many years ago. As the melody softened and came to an end, the older man regained his composure and stepped into the room.

“You’re a few days early,” he said as he approached the piano.

“And you’re up very late. Hello, Laguna.” Squall greeted him with a soft voice as if it was normal to see each other in the early hours of the morning within the Esthar Presidential Palace.

“How and when did you arrive?”

“I called earlier and told Kiros that I was coming tonight. He left word with the guards to give me priority clearance and a VIP room when I got here. Then I caught the train…I guess he didn’t tell you.”

“No, he didn’t mention it at all.” Laguna frowned in thought as he leaned on the piano. “Kiros has had a lot on his mind lately. With the ceremony coming up and Ward just getting over the flu, he’s been kinda busy. I’m glad you got here safely.”

Watching the brunette closely as he prepared to play again, Laguna sat next to him on the bench seat to help cover the nervous leg cramp beginning to make itself felt. Squall raised an eyebrow in question before closing his eyes to lose himself in the music again. Listening to the familiar melody again, Laguna nearly fell off the seat in surprise as Squall began to talk to him in a soft, almost wistful tone.

“Rinoa taught me to play this. Said my longer fingers could reach the keys easier. Then she would sit where you are now and sing the words her mother wrote for this song. It was…nice.”

Laguna heard the unhappy catch in his son’s voice, telling him that something had happened. Barely a month had passed since the end of the most recent sorceress war. The clean up was still going on in some places but the worst of it had been completed. Squall and his friends had returned to the Garden, where they had started to put their lives back together. Or so Laguna had thought.

“What happened?” he asked. Squall’s hands froze, the keys under his fingers sounding off as the song stopped abruptly.

“She left me,” the brunette said quietly.

“But you were perfect for each other. The sorceress and her knight. What went wrong?”

“She found another knight.”


“A few days ago. Seifer returned and was accepted back into the SeeD program. Rinoa dumped me the next day and went back to him. Guess I just wasn’t good enough,” Squall shrugged his shoulders then sighed.

Laguna grabbed the brunette’s chin and forced the stormy grey eyes to meet his dark aqua ones. The pain and sorrow he saw almost broke his heart. He would give anything to make that pain go away.

“Never think that you are not good enough. It’s Rinoa who doesn’t deserve you. You stood by her and protected her when everyone tried to seal away her powers. You saved her life countless times and she does this to you in return. Silly girl. When I see her next there will be words said.” Laguna released his grip on Squall’s face, fingers gently brushing over warm skin before clasping his own knees tightly. “The gang is still coming for the ceremony?”

“Yes, they will all be here. Even Seifer. What will I do?” Squall asked, as he buried his face in his hands.

“How do you mean?” Laguna asked.

“Rinoa…she started to help me to open up. That’s why I’m here now. It hurt a lot to see them together when she used to be mine. I didn’t want the others to see,” came the muffled answer.

“We show them how to have a good time and you dance with every pretty girl at the reception after the citizenship ceremony,” Laguna told the brunette as he placed a supportive arm gingerly around the young man’s shoulders.

Squall sat up and looked at the man who was his father and sighed. “I don’t dance. The first time I did was at my SeeD graduation and that was with…Rinoa. I just…can’t.”

“Yes, you can. We have a day or so before your friends arrive. I’ll teach you how,” Laguna told the brunette, grinning happily at the idea, while silently ordering his body not to react to the scent of Squall’s skin and clothing. The stormy eyed man needed a friend more than anything else right now and Laguna was determined to be just that.


“No buts, Squall. If this will help you be more comfortable with the others around, then it must be done. Now if you are finished playing, perhaps I could interest you in raiding the kitchens with me for some hot chocolate while we discuss a plan of attack.”

Laguna watched as Squall stood slowly and closed the key protector on the piano. Then as the brunette grabbed the candle to help light the way, Laguna seized his free hand and began to drag him towards the door. He needed to find another chair to sit in and fast before his son caught on to the slight limp he now had and questioned him about it. How the hell he was going to survive the next few days of close contact with his son, whom he lusted after, Laguna did not know.

“1, 2, 3...1, 2, 3...1, 2...Oof…AHHH!”




Laguna looked up into apologetic blue-grey eyes from his place on the polished wood floor, his third time there.

“That’s okay Squall. Let’s try it again.” Laguna accepted a hand up from his position and dusted himself off as he grinned at his son. Having you sprawled on the floor with me, or better yet under me would be much more interesting… SHIT, must stop thinking like that, the longhaired man commanded himself silently.

“No one will want to dance with me if I keep dumping my partners on the floor halfway through a turn,” Squall said, sighing in frustration as he ran slim fingers through his hair.

“All you need is…”

“More practise. I know. I wish it was that simple but I think it’s more complicated somehow.”

“How? You told me last night that you could dance some.” Laguna watched the brunette shake his head.

“No, I said that I’d danced with Rinoa and that Quistis said I was a natural. Your brain must’ve stopped functioning after the third or fourth handful of marshmallows you had,” Squall told Laguna with a small smile when he remembered eating the marshmallows with his father.

“Tell me about that night,” Laguna requested as they stood near the middle of the room.

“It was the graduation night for myself, Zell, Selphie and Nida. He’s the Garden’s pilot. Selphie was running around trying to get people interested in the upcoming festival. I guess I was being very anti-social by staying against the wall with my drink. That’s when I spotted a girl in a cream coloured dress watching the sky through the overhead glass dome like I was. She came over and asked me to dance, told me I was the best looking guy there. I tried to tell her no but she wouldn’t allow that answer, literally dragged me out onto the floor halfway through a dance. She led. I even bumped into her and this other couple really hard; it was just too difficult. That’s when I tried to leave the dance floor and she gave me this look with her head tilted to one side. I don’t really understand what happened next but everything seemed to click. We finished the dance perfectly and then before I could ask her name she thanked me and walked away. Haven’t danced since.”

Wow, that’s the most I’ve ever heard him say, Laguna thought as he watched Squall closely, seeing the stormy eyes misted over as he recalled the past. In those eyes he saw the lingering pain of a heart betrayed. After chatting over hot chocolate and those marshmallows the previous night, the Estharian president had decided that he would do anything to make this young man happy again, including making the direction of his affections known. However, this option was a last resort as Laguna would hate to drive Squall away from him and would rather endure unrequited love than the hatred of his only son.

Walking over to the middle of the room, Laguna motioned for Squall to join him. Taking the role of dance partner, Laguna hit the play button on the remote he held before putting it in his pocket, and began to lead Squall through the steps with some difficulty as Squall kept trying to watch their feet. The brunette was trying very hard to get it right, too hard. The aqua-eyed man sighed as he stopped moving.

“Squall, I want you to close your eyes. Feel the music, the soft beats and the way it flows through the air,” he told the other brunette in a quiet voice as they began to just sway to the music.

Squall closed his eyes like he was told and held Laguna a little closer as the taller man led him through the dance steps again.

“Ready?” Laguna asked, slightly awed by the trust the young man placed in him.

Squall nodded and held on tighter as he was lead through a series of quick turns in time with the music. When they slowed again, he automatically took the lead. They danced around the area in a wide circle, each step and turn perfect. As the song slowed, Squall leant down and dipped Laguna deeply, the other man’s long hair brushing the floor. Opening his still closed eyes, he found himself looking closely into dark aqua. Laguna smiled warmly and held on as Squall stood straight again, all the while trying not to think about the blue-grey depths of the brunette’s eyes, or of how close his lips were just then.

“That was great! You’ll have no problems if you can dance like that tomorrow night. Rinoa will be jealous for sure!” And so will I, Laguna thought to himself.

“I just have to find a way to do it with my eyes open,” Squall said quietly as the next song began. He moved to take the other man in his arms again, determined to get it right. However, he paused at the slight look of anguish on the other’s face.

Laguna stood very still and listened to the words of the song, praying that his face would give nothing away.

I saw you That was all I had to see Wanted you Had to have you next to me From that moment I knew that you’d be all I’d ever need

Laguna had first heard the song played the day after he’d met Squall here at the palace and had found it’s words very appropriate to how he thought of the young man. After Raine there had been no one, and now he’d fallen for his own son. If only he could work up the courage to tell him the truth and then be able to face the consequences.

“Laguna, you okay?” Squall asked, laying a hand on the man’s shoulder.

“Um, yeah…sure. No problems here,” Laguna tried to say convincingly. He focused on the stormy eyes watching him and knew that Squall didn’t believe him.

“Do you want to talk about it? Obviously this song holds some special meaning to you.”

If only you knew. This would be such a good opportunity to tell him if I wasn‘t such a chicken, Laguna thought to himself.

“Does it remind you of Raine?” Squall asked.

“Ah, no. Someone else actually,” said Laguna, scratching the back of his head and trying not to look too uneasy.

“Perhaps Rinoa’s mother then?” the brunette asked again while walking over to turn off the music.

“No, not Julia either.” Laguna felt his leg begin to twitch with an oncoming cramp…Not now!

“Is it someone I know?”

“I guess you could say that,” admitted the president before he looked at his watch in feigned surprise. “Is that the time? Sorry Squall, but I have to go and meet with Kiros about the ceremony tomorrow.”

Squall turned from the stereo and watched as his father walked very carefully towards the door. When Laguna had reached it he turned to the brunette.

“Don’t worry too much about the dances tomorrow, Squall. I have faith you’ll do just fine.” Then he was gone.

Squall stood next to the stereo, frowning at the closed door as questions raced through his mind.

Why had the song disturbed Laguna so much? If not Raine or Julia, then who was the person that he connected the words to that Squall apparently knew? And why did the Estharian president walk so carefully out of the room like he was trying to hide something…like discomfort or nervousness?

I remember that walk…like his leg had tensed up and he was trying not to limp too much or too obviously, Squall realised suddenly.

But why be nervous around me?

The president of Esthar watched his son closely while half listening to some bureaucrat drone on next to him. He’d only seen Squall in passing since their dance lesson the previous day and also at the ceremony held only a few hours ago because he was avoiding him. Avoiding being near enough to smell his scent or the feel warmth of his skin. Laguna sighed and politely excused him from the chatty man and moved to an area of the room where he could view all the people attending the ball.

Irvine and Selphie were dancing together, as was Zell and Quistis. They’d been swapping partners for the last few dances, socialising with the crowd. On the far side of the room, Laguna spotted Seifer walking away to get Rinoa a drink. He watched Rinoa observe the blond for a few seconds before turning to head in Squall’s direction.

Hyne, this will not be good, Laguna thought silently as he also headed for Squall, wanting to be near if needed. Since all the others had arrived for the ceremony this morning, the young brunette had been withdrawn and quiet. Laguna remembered greeting the group with Squall as they had disembarked from the Ragnarok. Squall had shaken hands with everyone except Rinoa and Seifer, to whom he had only nodded at before leading the way back to the palace. Then later at the honorary citizenship ceremony, Squall had chatted quietly with his friends and ignored Rinoa and Seifer, almost like he was pretending they weren’t around. However, with the young sorceress approaching the solitary figure at the table, Laguna knew that Squall would not be avoiding her now.

“Hello Squall, haven’t seen you around the Garden the past few days. We missed you,” Rinoa said to the brunette, flicking long raven coloured hair over one shoulder as she stopped next to him.


“Is that all the greeting I get? I thought we were friends. Don’t tell me you’re feeling bitter about my now dating Seifer? You are still my knight.”

Squall looked up into smug dark brown eyes, blinking in disbelief. She can’t possibly be serious, he thought. He frowned at her for the presumption.

“No, Rinoa. I am no longer your knight. You chose another.”

“But he’s not as strong as you,” she whined. “Even though you didn’t tell us, I felt you leave the Garden. My powers dropped to less than half their previous strength. You have to be my knight. I haven’t released you from my service yet, so you are still mine!”

Rinoa stamped her foot in anger, gearing up for a childish tantrum of epic proportions. And in public too. Squall stood and faced the irate sorceress, sighing quietly to himself at the sad necessity to become angry at the girl in return to get his message across. He watched as she crossed her arms in defence, unsure of what he was going to say.

“This was always about you. Your little resistance group; your sorceress powers. No more. I belong to myself from now on.”

“You are nothing without me,” Rinoa hissed, unfolding her arms to point an attacking finger at the brunette’s chest. “Before I came into your life, all that you were was an emotionless shell of a man. I made you open up. I helped you to be a part of the group and not just the commander. They are only your friends now because of me.”

Squall felt the small finger jabbing into his chest with each point that Rinoa made. Because of her he was now more open and that openness with her had hurt him. But what about the others? Will they still want to be my friends? Or was that all really just because of her? With unseeing eyes, Squall turned away from the sorceress and made his way to one of the balcony exits, his mind swirling with questions.

Laguna watched Squall leave, taking note of the door through which he went. As much as he wanted to follow and comfort the young man immediately, others needed to be dealt with first. Due to his observing the brunette, the older man failed to see another approach the sorceress until they spoke. He turned back to observe the conservation.

“I’d watch what you say about other people, Rinoa.”

Rinoa turned quickly from her observation of the brunette’s exit, looking guilty.

“Seifer! There you are. Do you have my drink, darling?” she said a little too brightly. Seifer looked down at her and raised a blond brow.

“Oh, so it’s darling now? Not the ‘he’s not as strong as you’ knight?” Seifer said, green eyes narrowed in anger and disgust as he placed the drink he had brought for her on the nearest table.

“Seifer, I can explain,” Rinoa tried to reassure the tall man.

“Explain what? That you wanted to be greedy and have two knights?” Seifer shook his head at the sorceress. “Sorry Rin, but that’s not going to be a difficult choice for you anymore. I don’t want to be with you. See, when you came to me and we got together, I was under the impression that all you and Squall had was an infatuation with each other, not that you were supposed to be a couple.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt anyone,” Rinoa said in a whispered voice while trying to look small and defenceless. Seifer was not convinced.

“But in all your girly childishness and simplistic view of the world, you did. Squall, and the others are more than friends to me,” the blond began to explain. “They are my family and we help, support and love each other, unconditionally. Something you don’t seem to understand.”

“Seifer, where are you going?” Rinoa asked when she realised that he was turning away from her.

“We are through, Rinoa. Find yourself another knight.”

“You’ve only been back at the Garden for a week or so and you expect them to welcome you into their little group like that? You tried to kill them! Some loving, supportive family member you are.”

Rinoa held her breath as the tall blond turned back to her and leaned in close, eyes glinting angrily.

“Goodbye Rinoa. Take you’re acidic tongue elsewhere.”

Rinoa stood and watched Seifer leave. About to pick up the drink left for her, she jumped a little when someone touched her shoulder from behind.

“Squall…?” she asked, turning around slowly.

“No, Rinoa. Leave Squall alone. You have done enough damage there.”

“Laguna, I didn’t see you there,” she said pleasantly, praying that he had not seen her speak to his son just a few moments ago. Her hopes were soon destroyed.

“That’s President Loire,” Laguna told her, his aqua eyes giving her a hard, piercing look, “and I heard everything. Let me tell you something I was taught a long time ago. The things that you say are wrong with others in your eyes are usually the things you hate about yourself. See, the truth is without a knight; your power is weak and unstable. Without Squall or Seifer by your side, the rest of the group will probably ignore you and you’ll be asked to leave the Garden.”

“And Squall does have emotions. You just have to be close enough to him for to trust you and let down his walls,” said the ever-perceptive Kiros as he came out of the shadows to stand beside Laguna.

“That’s the thing, Rinoa. Squall began to trust you and you hurt him. Badly. Now here is my suggestion to you. Leave Esthar and never show your face here or at any of the Gardens again. Or I’ll have you arrested for illegal entry into the country.” Rinoa watched as Laguna dismissed her presence from his mind and turn to address his advisor. “Kiros, please escort Miss Heartilly to her quarters to collect her belongings, and then get some guards to take her to the train station and send her to Deling City.”

Rinoa gasped in shock that judgement on her actions had been passed so quickly. “But you can’t! I’m an honorary citizen. I have rights.”

Kiros turned to her as Laguna left them, headed for the same door that Squall had exited through earlier. He smiled predatorily as the sorceress shrunk away from his commanding aura and addressed her in a cold, firm and somewhat threatening voice.

“Your citizenship will be revoked in the morning, and if the President forgets, I assure that I won’t. Some advice before you leave - find a nice, sedate young man to be your knight and settle down. Do not try to cause any disturbances. It won’t be the President of Esthar who comes after you; it’ll be Laguna Loire. The soldier. I promise that if we have to come after you, it won’t be a pretty sight after it’s over. This is your only warning.” Kiros grabbed her elbow firmly to escort her from the room. “Now let’s go.”

Laguna stepped through the door and onto the balcony, pausing for a few moments to allow his eyes adjust to the darker area that was lit only with moonlight. He trusted Kiros to make the young sorceress understand that upsetting Squall was the worst thing she could ever do and if she became troublesome in the future, she would be dealt with. But enough about that...must find Squall, Laguna thought as he scanned the shadows with his eyes.

Even with music being piped out from the ballroom via overhead speakers, Laguna caught the unmistakable sound of boots scraping against metal railings behind him. Turning, he spotted Squall leaning against one of the large marble pillars, his face in shadows. He didn’t get a chance to ask how the young man was doing when Squall spoke first.

“Guess you heard everything?” Squall asked, stepping into the light. Laguna could see silverly tracks of silent tears as he nodded.

“You’re crying,” he stated simply.

“What’s it matter if no one cares?” Squall said, turning his face towards the moonlight and closing his eyes.

Laguna approached his son and used a thumb to smooth the tear-streaked face as he whispered quietly; “I care.”

Squall leaned into the comforting caress and accepted the man’s embrace, placing his cheek on Laguna‘s shoulder. Warm hands rubbed his back gently as they rocked slowly in time with the soft music. Squall couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so safe. Certainly not in Rinoa’s arms. He sighed.

“She’s right you know,” he said, voice slightly muffled by Laguna’s shirt collar. “The others won’t want to be my friends now. We’ll just go back to the way it was before. Except I’ll still be commander and this will keep them from wanting to be close to me. I don’t want to go back to the Garden and watch them from a distance.”

“Don’t you dare believe Rinoa’s lies,” Laguna said, holding Squall in a firm hug. “They are still your friends, and also your family. If it helps, you missed seeing Seifer tell her to find another knight. Seems he heard what she said to you. It was the blond that said you were all family.”

Squall’s head came up from Laguna’s shoulder, a shocked expression on his face. “He said all that?”

“He did. He told her she was childish and to find another knight,” Laguna said, grinning happily. Then his look became serious. “If you’re not ready to go back to the Garden just yet, stay here. I’ll hire you on as a personal bodyguard for as long as you need.”

“That…would be really nice. Thanks Laguna,” the brunette said as he laid his head back on the older man’s shoulder.

Laguna smiled as they resumed their rocking hug, happy to bring Squall some comfort. Inwardly, he was hurriedly thinking of ways he could possibly avoid the young man he lusted after. The longhaired man was so absorbed in his thoughts that he missed the question he was asked.

“Huh? What?” he asked.

“I was just wondering why you were nervous around me the other day after dance practise? I saw the slight limp and was hoping that my staying here for awhile would not cause you any troubles.”

Laguna took a step back and looked into the moonlit face. He realised that if the brunette were to stay at the palace, he would have to be honest with himself and Squall. His leg began to cramp.

“Well, you see…um,” Laguna stuttered, unsure of how to approach the topic.

“Would it have anything to do with this song?” Squall asked him.

And there's a place inside my heart
Nobody's touched before
And when I found you
I found all that I'd been searching for
You turned my world around

Laguna tilted his head and listened to the music. How appropriate, he thought as the song drifted around them.

“Do I remind you of someone else?” Squall asked another question, trying to get some kind of answer from the man before him.

Laguna looked Squall square in the face and smiled softly.

“No, not of someone else,” he said. “Just you.”

Squall looked confused as Laguna took him back into his arms and began to waltz slowly across the balcony.

“See, as the President of Esthar I am grateful to have you as an ally. As your father, I am proud with what you have accomplished in your life. Yet, as a man,” Laguna paused, choosing his next words carefully, “a man who didn’t know who you were when we first met and a man who wants to be there for you always, I want you.”

Squall looked stunned as they stopped dancing.

“You want me?” he asked, as he watched Laguna’s eyes.

“Yes, just you.”

When Squall made no move away from his arms, Laguna leaned in and brushed his lips lightly over the younger man’s. He felt the indrawn breath as the brunette gasped and felt fingers flex delicately across his shoulders. Still Squall didn’t pull away, so Laguna applied a little more pressure with his lips and began to nibble gently. Fingers moved more firmly against his back and he felt the lips beneath his begin to move. Groaning at the act of acceptance, he held Squall closer, wrapping arms around the small waist as he ran his tongue across the brunette’s bottom lip. Squall moaned quietly and opened his mouth, allowing Laguna’s tongue a taste of the heat inside.

Squall’s mind floated, buoyed by the scent and feel of the man in his arms, the man kissing him. It had never felt like this with Rinoa. This was heat and tingly skin and warm breath. When Laguna’s tongue entered his mouth, Squall found he tasted like chocolates and champagne. It was intoxicating.

Finally breaking for air, they found that the song had finished while they were otherwise occupied. Laguna looked at Squall’s slightly flushed cheeks. “Say yes,” he said quietly in a voice only for the man in his arms.

Squall looked into aqua eyes, darkened by pleasure and saw what it would mean to say that one word. To always be safe and cherished. To be loved.


Laguna smiled gently and placed a light kiss on the younger brunette’s nose. Taking Squall’s hand, he began to lead them away from the ballroom doors and to the far end of the balcony wall. Placing his hand on a panel, he heard Squall’s surprised gasp as the section of wall near it slid open quietly.

“The whole palace is riddled with secret passages. This one leads to an elevator that leads directly to the presidential floor. It’s only keyed to accept myself, Kiros and Ward. We’ll add you tomorrow,” Laguna explained as he led the way into the passage. Darker than the moonlit balcony, they found their way by proximity sensor lights that guided their steps to the lift. Entering the lift, Laguna keyed the communications unit built into the elevator wall.

“Yes Laguna?” came Kiros’ questioning voice. Laguna smiled at Squall when he saw his surprised expression and raised their clasped hands to kiss his fingertips.

“I’m retiring for the night. See that Squall’s friends are comfortable and that I’m not disturbed until late tomorrow.”

“And your son?” Kiros asked.

“Is with me,” Laguna told him, shooting a grin in Squall’s direction.

“Ah,” was all Kiros said, and then, “that issue has been dealt with. Sleep well Laguna, Squall.”

“Goodnight Kiros.”

“What issue?” Squall asked as the lift came to a halt and opened in the same passageway as Laguna’s suite.

“I’ve revoked Rinoa’s honorary citizenship. She is no longer welcome here in Esthar,” he told the brunette as he led the way into his private quarters.

“Thank you,” was all Squall could say, at a loss for other words.

“Squall, I will protect you as best I can. Seeing as though you can take care of yourself physically, I’ll look after everything else,” Laguna told him as he drew the young man into his arms and began to brush his lips over a soft cheek.

“I’ve never done this before,” Squall said, his voice shaking slightly with nervous energy.

“Kinda figured that, love. I’ll show you everything,” Laguna promised as he swept the stormy eyed man off his feet with a laugh and carried him into the bedroom.

Setting Squall in the edge of the bed, Laguna knelt to remove his shoes. “Nervous?” he asked.

Squall nodded and wriggled his toes. “A little.” The brunette understood the mechanics of sleeping with another man, sexual education a required lecture at the Garden once someone hit their teenage years. But he knew that this would be much different from being with a girl - not that he had. Blue-grey eyes watched Laguna walk to the adjoining en-suite and turn on the light.

“I recommend a shower, then. You’ve had a long afternoon in that formal SeeD uniform. You’ll feel a lot better afterwards,” the older man told him as he tossed a midnight blue robe in his direction.

Squall accepted the towel and disappeared. As soon as the door closed, Laguna raced into the main living area and the second bathroom and practically threw himself under the hot water. Barely a minute later, he emerged and slipped into a robe similar to the one he’d given Squall, reckoning that he’d be over dressed otherwise. Returning to the bedroom, he opened the long curtains that covered the ceiling to floor windows behind the bed. Moonlight flooded into the room and across the bed. Happy with the setting, he wandered out to the kitchen and retrieved a chilled bottle of champagne and two tall glasses. Returning to the room he found that Squall had also finished his shower.

Seated on the edge of the bed, the commander of the Garden was a vision to behold. Legs lightly crossed at the ankle, Squall lent back slightly on one hand, his face turned to the moon as he dried his damp hair. Moonlight reflected off the robe and gave the brunette’s skin a soft glow.

“I got us something to drink,” Laguna said as he entered the room, not wanting to startle the angel on his bed.

Squall turned from his contemplation of the moon and smiled as Laguna poured them both a drink before approaching the bed. Standing to take the glass from Laguna, Squall let his eyes gaze over the older man’s form. For a man now in his forty’s, Laguna had aged well and still retained much of the form and charm he’d had in his twenty’s.

“A toast?” he asked.

“Sure, why not. To brighter futures and new beginnings!” Laguna said as their glasses met with a quiet ‘chink’ before emptying the contents in one swallow.

“Rather cliché?” Squall asked as he handed his empty glass to Laguna with a cheeky grin.

“So?” the aqua-eyed man said in mock defence as he wrapped an arm around the brunette and pulled him closer.

Squall gasped at the warmth radiating from Laguna as the man’s lips descended upon his. Opening his mouth automatically, Squall shivered slightly as a wet tongue began to explore inside. Hands came up to frame his face as Laguna sucked on his bottom lip. Taking a step back as the other man stepped forward, Squall found himself released and falling backwards onto a soft bed. He held up a hand, inviting Laguna to join him.

Laguna took the offered hand and kissed each fingertip before showering kisses the length of the arm as he settled himself on the bed next to Squall. Reaching the shoulder, Laguna peeled the robe away from that one section of the brunette’s body and nibbled his way to Squall’s neck.

Squall squirmed on the cool sheets, awash with sensations from this simple action. He gasped as Laguna found a particular sensitive spot below his ear and then writhed as the other man proceeded to lathe that place with his tongue. His hands moved of their own free will, one moving to grasp the long strands of hair that tickled his slightly bared chest and the other to pull Laguna closer.

Laguna settled one leg between Squall’s and carefully rested his weight on the form below him. Uncovering the other shoulder, he fully bared Squall’s chest and trailed kisses down towards one of the hardened nipples. He smiled when the brunette’s chest rose sharply with an intake of air as he began to bathe the hard nub with his tongue. He continued to switch from one nub to the other, using lips, teeth and tongue until Squall squirmed and begged beneath him. Moving lower, he rubbed his cheek against the robe covered erection. The cloth parted as Squall’s hips rocked upwards at the new stimulus.

Squall felt like every nerve ending was charged with electricity. Involuntarily, his hips rocked up and he looked down to see Laguna admiring his erection, no longer covered by the robe. “Please,” he begged, indicating the robe tie.

Laguna moved back up Squall’s body to help the brunette remove the robe. Then he looked directly into lust filled blue eyes and slipped out of his own robe. Smiling gently as he saw Squall raise a hand to touch him, he grabbed the hand and kissed the palm.

“Explore me tomorrow, love. Tonight’s for you,” he told the brunette.

Squall nodded and leaned up to pull Laguna back down for another kiss. Trailing kisses down the body under him again, Laguna found himself faced with the brunette’s weeping erection. His tongue darted out to taste the young man’s essence, and Laguna chuckled at the throaty moan that came from his lover. Leaning forward, he placed his lips around the head of Squall’s erection and then held down the man’s hips as they bucked involuntarily. Slowly he took Squall’s length into his mouth, feeling with velvety strength and savouring the faint musky scent of arousal.

Squall’s mind shut down the moment Laguna’s lips made contact with his rigid length and his world now consisted of the moist heat surrounding him, devouring him with pleasure. Laguna sucked and nibbled at the hardness in his mouth as one of his hands searched for the tube he’d tossed onto the bed earlier. Finally finding the tube, he generously coated his fingers and lifted one of Squall’s legs over his shoulder while he still sucked of the man’s erection.

Feeling his leg being moved, Squall forced his eyes open and looked down at the longhaired man. Laguna eyes were a dark aqua as he watched the younger brunette watch him. Running a lubed finger over Squall’s puckered hole, Laguna hummed softly as he inserted the finger as gently as he could. Squall’s eyes widened slightly at the dual sensations of slight discomfort and vibrating pleasure. This continued for each finger that Laguna used to stretch the body under him. Soon Squall was thrusting back against his hand, moaning and writhing in extreme pleasure each time his fingers brushed against the brunette’s prostate.

Deciding that Squall was now ready, Laguna quickly coated his length in the clear gel and moved up along the lithe body to look into pleasure-hazed eyes. The brunette looked so beautiful like this. Laguna leaned down to brush his lips across Squall’s in a whispering kiss.

“This will hurt some, but I promise not for long,” he told Squall as he positioned his erection at the brunette’s opening. Squall nodded and tried to relax as much as he could when he felt Laguna start to press in.

It stung somewhat but Squall did not ask Laguna to stop. The feeling of fullness was a pleasurable sensation and the brunette moaned deeply, and echoing groan coming from the man poised above him. Slowly, Laguna began to move.

Surrounded by tight heat, it took all Laguna’s willpower not to pound the brunette into the bed. Setting a steady pace, aqua eyes drank in every expression that flitted across Squall’s face. Sensing eyes on him, Squall looked up and smiled. Leaning up as best he could, he brushed lips gently across Laguna’s.

“I won’t break, Laguna,” he told the older man as he pushed down on the upward thrust of Laguna’s erection.

Wrapping both legs around his waist, Laguna captured Squall’s lips in a passionate kiss as he withdrew and thrust deeply. The brunette bucked in his arms as his prostrate was hit, gasping for air to feed the almost continuous moans as Laguna began to thrust fast and deep into the willing body beneath him. Reaching between their bodies, Laguna found Squall’s length and began to pump it, matching the rhythm of his thrusts. Together they rocked upon the bed, a tangle of moonlight-bathed limbs. Squall felt the pleasure coil within him, and feeling the white heat of orgasm overtake him, he shouted Laguna’s name. Laguna followed quickly with his own shout, as he could not fight the pull of Squall’s body clenching around his length.

For some time they lay there, in the moonlight, sharing kisses as Laguna used Squall’s hand to wipe his essence off them and then sucking each finger clean. Rolling gently on his side, he drew the sated and drowsy brunette into his arms and smiled down at the slumbering face as Squall fell asleep almost immediately.

“I’ll never let you go, Squall,” Laguna whispered to the sleeping man, thinking of the words from the song. “I love you.”

Then, placing a kiss on the brunette’s shoulder and pulling the covers more closely around them, Laguna followed his lover into sleep but not before hearing those words repeated in a sleepy, contented whisper.


Notes from the Gnome - My first LxS fic. Hope it was okay. Wasn’t sure I could make them convincing enough but I feel fine with it. Inspired to try the pairing after reading Blackrose’s fics. Great writer! Anyways, reviews much welcome and thanks for reading.